Ian

541 Days Road, Kingston, ON K7M3R8, CA

The Reclamation Project: The Value of Living Life at the Helm

Stories of life in an institution and the voices that closed them

Ian

I was born overseas and lived in many different countries. When I was 15 I lived in an institute in Pennsylvania and at the age of 17 I moved to the Edgar Adult Occupational Centre.

I shared a room with 7 other people. They would steal my things. I had a lot of my possessions stolen, like a beautiful coat, a valuable ring, and some camping equipment. My Dad and his wife tried to be helpful and would send me things, but they would get stolen. That’s why I am very possessive about my things today. I carry a lot of my possessions in a bag around with me every day so they don’t get stolen. I will also pick things up that I find and put them in my bag.

My meds were never on time. As a result, I would suffer with many seizures and the injuries related to them. Because of that, I am now very anxious about my meds today. I have alarms set on my phone for 4 times a day to make sure that my meds are on time.

I had to share the bathroom with lots of other men. Our clothes were taken away and there was no privacy. We even had to share one bar of soap. Other people would stare at me and I would try to hide a washcloth so I could cover my private parts. They would only give us 1 cloth for our shower.

I only had one friend in Edgar. We couldn’t walk around and if I was ever caught off the ward, I was grounded. Sometimes I would be confined and they wouldn’t give me my breakfast or my medication. If I didn’t make my bed properly the staff would strip the bed and I had to make it again and again until it was right. If I got upset and acted out I was beaten and sent outside. I was badly beaten when I lived there. I remember being dragged on the cement, even if I was unconscious.

Staff would often be mean. They would tie up the swing sets so I couldn’t use them. One staff gave me booze. It was even in one of my blood work reports that I had high levels of alcohol. There were never any celebrations or special occasions. They wouldn’t even wish me a happy birthday. My dad would visit me but we were always guarded and we weren’t allowed to go off the property. There were no activities and never anything fun to do.

When I lived at the institution in Pennsylvania I had a job making candles. At Edgar I made beds, cleaned toilets and bathrooms, and shined shoes. It was also my job to set the tables for everyone’s meals. If I forgot to set it properly I would be punished and have to sit and watch the others eat. I never got paid for anything.

My dad and his wife were always trying to help. My dad and aunt tried to rescue me once. My mom finally took me out and we moved overseas where I had to go into the military.

I moved back to Canada and in with a couple for a while. They moved to Nova Scotia and now I am supported by Community Living Kingston and District. I work at Kwik Shred. I also do lawn maintenance and clean tables at CLKD.

Today, I have different names for things because some words remind me of my time in the institution. My staff now are called friends, my seizures are called spells. Some people think I have PTSD from my time in the institution. It takes me a long time to develop relationships with other people. Honesty is very important to me. I often get into arguments because I am so anxious about my medications.

I have a couple of friends and a girlfriend named Margaret. We have loved each other for many years. She lives with her parents so it’s hard to see her.

In my spare time, I like to be alone. I don’t like it when my friends tell me what to do. I help out at the Humane Society, walking the animals. I like my Gizmo, and I like bowling and playing baseball. I like doing puzzles and I try to see an Elvis impersonator whenever I can. I also like to go camping and going out to restaurants.